If a former prospect is dogging you, but not seriously enough to report him or her as an abuse, on some sites, you can search in Invisible or Stealth mode.
Doing so prevents you from being seen on the Who’s Online feature.
The Internet-appropriate action to take is to simply say“I need to stop now. If it’s an argument telling you why you are a match, simply sign off. Regarding the third action, no stranger is worth any emotional investment on your part, especially negative ones. If someone has really incensed you, avoid further trouble even though you’re anonymous. They are unlikely to go postal on you, but some people are sufficiently sick to do some serious libel and slander.
I’ve enjoyed chatting with you, but I don’t think we’re a match. Some people flame others by sending e-mails, warning people of a person’s supposed bad character. He is [insert issue here].”) Although you could sue them for defamation, who needs the grief?
As with real life, you must do it quickly — and with a modicum of kindness, if possible.Remember that nothing is ever completely erased on the Internet, so made-up abuse is pretty easy to expose.And if you report inappropriately, the site will monitor your mail.Granted, for some people, a more heavy-handed approach is necessary. Polite is good, but if it doesn’t work, try sterner and firmer. If you need further coaching, go to your local electric company’s customer service department and see how it handles you when you try to dispute a bill by saying, “I never used that electricity.” Many appropriate ways are available to encourage someone to move along. This article points out the major ways to do so in specific situations.Say that you get an e-mail from someone, and you can tell immediately that you have no interest in communicating with that person.The best way to avoid this sort of thing is to kill people with kindness, even if they don’t deserve it.Say that you’re in the midst of a phone call with a prospect (after some e-mail exchanges), and you realize that he or she just isn’t a match.When someone just won’t quit bothering you and all else fails, you have to dispense with being polite.Just as dogs get only one bite (actually, they don’t get any free bites), your discouraged suitor gets only one “apology” from you. The following line is pretty darn effective but only use it as a last resort:“You need to know that if you attempt to contact me again, I’ll report your activities as an abuse to the dating site.Here are the Internet-appropriate ways to say no: Note that Internet dating sites vary in the sophistication of their features.On some sites, the person knowsthat you received his or her e-mail and read it.